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Title: Aftermath
Author: anenko
Fandom: Hana Kimi TW
Summary: Rui Xi isn't okay. [Post-episode six]
Rating: PG13; reference to a past sexual assault.
Disclaimer: The manga isn't mine. The drama isn't mine. Hana Kimi has nothing to do with me at all.



Afterwards, Rui Xi acted as bright and strange as ever.

Quan told himself to stop worrying. Rui Xi was fine.

*

Rui Xi had never been shy around her classmates. There had been times when Quan had thought she was a little too at ease among them. Be careful, he’d wanted to say, don’t forget who you are.

Quan had wanted Rui Xi to be careful. He had never wanted to see the muted panic in her eyes when their classmates crowded around her. Her laughter was too loud, nervous and shrill when Xiu Yi dropped an arm around her shoulder. Zheng Hao leaned in too close when he laughed.

Quan ignored his friends’ startled glances as he pushed past them. He took Rui Xi’s hand in his own, and drew her in close. “They’re obnoxious,” Quan said into the curve of Rui Xi’s ear, “but they’re harmless.”

“I know,” Rui Xi said, squeezing Quan’s hand tightly. “I know.

*

Rui Xi had never been peaceful in her sleep. Quan had spent months learning the sounds she made while asleep: soft snuffles, and startlingly loud snores when she was especially tired. She laughed in her sleep, and held mumbled conversations with herself that sounded like Quan, Quan, Quan.

She had never cried before.

“no,” Rui Xi groaned, “no, no, no no nononostop!” The bed above Quan creaked as Rui Xi began to thrash against her bedding, her breath loud and fast. “please,” she said, and her voice broke on a sob.

Quan’s hands curled into fists. Rui Xi was good, and innocent, and so trusting it hurt. Rui Xi should never have been given reason to learn that the world was unkind. Rui Xi should never sound so terrified.

Her fists swung out in blind fury when Quan shook her awake. He could taste blood at the back of his throat. Rui Xi’s eyes were wide and unseeing in the darkness. Her shoulder was rigid beneath Quan’s hand. Her face was wet, her mouth twisted in panic, and Quan didn’t know what to do.

“I’m here,” he said. “I’m here. You’re safe, Rui Xi.”

Rui Xi twisted out from beneath Quan’s hands, turned her back to him. “I’m fine. I’m fine,” she said. She was crying again, softer but no less desperately than before. “I’m so stupid.

Quan wiped the blood from his mouth. “No,” he said, “you aren’t.

*
Afterwards, Rui Xi smiled as bright and warm as the morning sun.

“I think,” she said, “that it must be horrible to be a woman.”

--end

Comments

( 9 comments — Leave a comment )
aliaspiral
Dec. 11th, 2008 10:00 pm (UTC)
Aterwards, Rui Xi smiled as bright and warm as the morning sun.

“I think,” she said, “that it must be horrible to be a woman.”


*breaks*

oh, how do you DO these things to me? Quan, all helpless and wanting to help her so much, to protect her, to make her feel safe, and he cant, and she's hurting and trying to pretend she isnt and OH.

*flails wordlessly* this. just..yes. this.
anenko
Dec. 11th, 2008 11:58 pm (UTC)
You have no idea how nervous this fic made me! It practically wrote itself on the way home from work, but. . . I didn't want to muck things up, you know?

I'm very glad that you approve!
aliaspiral
Dec. 14th, 2008 03:35 am (UTC)
the last two lines make me choke up. because i can SEE her saying it, the twisted smile, trying so hard to be brave and joke about it, and Quan's heart just BREAKING, because he knows the truth, knows what she isn't saying, and alskasljald.
biases
Dec. 14th, 2008 06:42 am (UTC)
*cries*

Oh, those last two lines! My eyes prickled when I read them, poor, poor Rui Xi.

And poor helpless Quan and his layered "you aren't".

Gorgeous.
anenko
Dec. 14th, 2008 10:53 am (UTC)
The girl goes through a *lot* of trauma in a short period of time. And Ella really sells it.

I'm very glad you enjoyed the fic (which is all alispiral's fault, of course).
aliaspiral
Dec. 14th, 2008 01:50 pm (UTC)
hey, you force me to watch stupid dramas, i force bunnies upon you. IT ALL WORKS OUT.

there is a sinful lack of HK TW icons out there in lj land. SINFUL. im going to be forced to make some, and that isnt generally a good thing.
anenko
Dec. 14th, 2008 01:59 pm (UTC)
there is a sinful lack of HK TW icons out there in lj land. SINFUL. im going to be forced to make some, and that isnt generally a good thing.

I know! I've been playing around with icons, too. HKTW is so cute and full of *pretty* that the serious icon makers should have been all over it.

I've also found these icons. And that's pretty much it. Woe.
aliaspiral
Dec. 14th, 2008 02:47 pm (UTC)
ive already made out off with one of your icons, and ive looked at the other icons by that..other person, and im not terribly impressed with those.

so, it must be up to me to make some! i want to cap a little of the show, anyway, because the businessmen in love scene is TOO CUTE not to cap. ill toss any decent caps up in a post so you can play with them too, if you want.
anenko
Dec. 16th, 2008 12:18 am (UTC)
I'm totally stealing any nice Quan icons you make. I just can't get one of the poor boy that I actually *like.* Why is making an icon of such a hot guy so *hard*?
( 9 comments — Leave a comment )

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